I should have known this was going to be a long night in Florida; all the warning signs were there. While trying to purchase my goods at the grocery store the check out lady laughed at the contents of my basket. I guess green salsa, black beans, and a huge bottle of hair spray aren’t a normal combination for this part of the country? All I know is that these are necessities for my life to function correctly. Before this ordeal I had to deal with the worlds worst salesmen at T-mobile. Trying to get a new cell phone turned out to be a traumatizing experience so I was already emotionally exhausted and just wanted some yummy black beans and salsa to compliment the breakfast burrito I was going to make for dinner.
Making my burrito hit its first roadblock when I realized that I didn’t have any tortillas! Soooo I had to improvise and use a flat bread wrap thing. Problem sloved.
Next my black beans exploded. Seriously. Exploded. I opened the can and they shot out like a rocket all over my shirt and our condo. I didn’t think much of it and put them on the stove to cook, which The Mother had said she left on for me. After about 10 minutes my eggs were done, but my beans hadn’t even started to boil … turns out the stove wasn’t even on.
In the end my burrito came together and was delicious. All was right in my world, until The Mother’s lotion exploded and I told her that’s what happened to my beans.
Making my burrito hit its first roadblock when I realized that I didn’t have any tortillas! Soooo I had to improvise and use a flat bread wrap thing. Problem sloved.
Next my black beans exploded. Seriously. Exploded. I opened the can and they shot out like a rocket all over my shirt and our condo. I didn’t think much of it and put them on the stove to cook, which The Mother had said she left on for me. After about 10 minutes my eggs were done, but my beans hadn’t even started to boil … turns out the stove wasn’t even on.
In the end my burrito came together and was delicious. All was right in my world, until The Mother’s lotion exploded and I told her that’s what happened to my beans.
Immediately The Mother starting running around looking for her cell phone to call my daddy to tell him I had Botulism, called her mother to ask if I should go to the hospital, started researching everything on the internet, and asked me why in the world I ate the beans if the exploded. Well… I didn’t know…. I just wanted my beans… no one ever told me not to eat beans that explode from the can… or anything other vegetable that comes from a can might I add.
Good news if I am alive in 12 hrs I didn’t get botulism. But I am probably in for food poisoning. This vacation I have learned a lesson I will never ever forget. DON’T EAT EXPLODING BEANS!
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